EVERY author has to, at some time, master writing about violence and sex, two archetypal experiences intrinsic to and representative of human life at any age and time. By this I truly mean “writing about” rather than writing explicit gratuitous violence or sex. It’s the difference between the emotional experience of a soldier being wounded, and a detailed account of every gory detail as the bullet rips through his or her body. The same with sex.

I can vividly recall an email from my fi...